We Can’t All Be Wrong

25 03 2010

   My trip to the doctor yesterday did not go as well as I had hoped. I got in there, took off my shoes and got on the scale.  137.

   I immediately told the nurse that the scale was wrong.

 She brings me in the room and begins taking my blood pressure. I tell her that I have been exercising and eating better. I tell her that according to my calculations I weigh 132. She tells me that I have gained two pounds since my last visit in November but please, please don’t get frustrated and stop exercising. I tell her that I enjoy going to the gym and I have no plans to stop. She then tells me that everyone says the scale is wrong.

 Well what the fuck lady! If we all say the same thing, don’t ya think it might be a good idea to get your stupid scale checked?

 When the doctor comes in, I tell him all about his broken scale. He tells me it’s a $600 scale. I tell him that you don’t always get what you pay for and to get that thing calibrated.

 I tell him all about my diet and exercise. I tell him that I am sure I am losing weight. I tell him that I would have bet money that my weight gain was due to my Hashimoto’s disease and that my Thyroid was off. He tells me that my Thyroid levels were fine.

 Well if I am doing what I need to do, and my levels are fine, what could the common denominator be?

 How about your broken scale, asshole.

 You know what he says then? He suggests that maybe it’s muscle mass. I think he is in cahoots with my enabling sister.

  I tell him that prior to last year, my normal range was between 122 and 127. I tell him that so far, I have only been doing cardio so his muscle mass theory is out. He tells me he wants to see me again in three months and that he wants more blood work. He then gets up, sticks his head out the door and yells down the hall that I am coming back in three months, could someone make sure the scale is fixed by then?

 That’s what I thought!

 All the blood work is Hashimoto’s related. Clearly he is not convinced that my last tests were accurate. I still think it’s his scale.

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6 responses

25 03 2010
Mrs. Chili

I’m still holding my vote for muscle mass….

26 03 2010
Auntie

Did you not see my gut when we went to the water park? That’s nice, though. Your a good sister. Thanks.

26 03 2010
Laurie B

Drs office scales are always 10 pounds heavy. Been testing that for over thirty years, can’t write a paper about it but believe it to be true. Hang in there, Springtime is here, hope that you and TG get out for some walks after supper.

27 03 2010
Kizz

My doc’s scale is the same as Laurie’s. When weighing in I still go by mine, though. Screw his medically accurate bullshit!

28 03 2010
Auntie

His scale is off by 4 pounds. I checked myself on two different scales this week, both gave me the same number.

31 03 2010
gerryrosser

A pound of muscle weighs exactly as much as a pound of fat.

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