Most people, especially women, don’t like birthdays. I happen to love them. Oprah says we should celebrate our birthdays and honor ourselves and I agree. In honor of my birthday, I thought I would share 35 things, one for every year I have been on this planet, that I have learned.
1. This is the card I was talking about awhile ago. Chili gave it to me many years ago. It’s the “So far” part that I love. I have learned that life is a never ending process of growth. Although I try very hard to stay in the moment, I can’t help but be excited about what I will learn next.
2. It really IS easy to make a homemade cake! Chili taught me how. Before that I didn’t even know it could be done. I really thought the only way to do it is from a box.
3. The above mentioned cake tastes better when it is made by someone else, especially when it made with love.
4. Relationships are work. The ones worth keeping are GOOD work. Some relationships are hard work that yield no results. I have learned to let go of the hard ones and focus my energy on the ones that are good work. My life has been much happier since I figured that one out.
5. Family has nothing to do with blood. The Chili’s are my only blood family that I have in my life. My friends make up the rest. I would throw myself in front of a bus for a number of people in my life. It feels really good to love like that. It also feels good to be loved like that.
6. Baseball is good for my soul. I heart the Red Sox!
7. Coffee is the best drink in the entire world. It’s the one thing I don’t mind spending extra for. I still shop around for it though.
8. I have learned to ask myself, “What is your intention?”when ever I am about to do or say something that is super important. I learned this at work when I was dealing with cranky teenagers. It’s a great way to stay in the moment and not make mindless choices based on old patterns.
9. Speaking of choice, I have learned that I have a lot more choices than I thought I did. I have said it before and I will probably say it a million more times, you can’t choose what someone says or does to you, but you do get to choose how YOU react to them.
10. More on choice; I have learned that happiness is a choice. People often comment on my good attitude and my optimism. I tell them that I choose that.
11. In addition to number 10, there is no need to attach any negative emotion to “bad” stuff. It is what it is. I deal and move on.
12. I don’t believe in right or wrong, bad or good. What’s right or good for me may be wrong or bad for you. I really just like to go with different.
13. I have learned, and continue to learn, to trust myself.
14. I have learned to sit with myself and just BE.
15. I shop around and have no issues buying generic food products. Some generic things I just won’t touch. Mac and cheese from a box and tampons immediately come to mind.
16. I need at least 7 hours of sleep every night to function well.
17. I am so NOT a night person.
18. It’s ok to stand up for myself.
19. I have learned to ask for help. That was a tough one.
20. Less is more. I am a minimalist and I find an odd sense of comfort in that.
21. I also find comfort in a clean house. I used to be obsessive about having a clean house. I think because at that time, I felt like it was the only thing in my life I felt like I had total control over. Since I have learned about choice, I have come to realize that it just feels good to have a clean house.
22. I have learned to hold my tongue.
23. Not all people find my sarcasm funny. I am happy to tone it down when not doing so would upset someone I love.
24. I have learned to be patient. Bean had a lot to do with that. When she was a baby she hated me and would scream whenever I tried to hold her. I knew that in time she would warm up to me and it was more important for me to respect her feelings than to try to force her to like me. She says she loves me now. We’re cool.
25. I have learned to challenge myself. No one challenged me when I was a kid and as a result I had no idea what I was capable of. I try to challenge myself emotionally, professionally, and academically on a regular basis.
26. Loose jeans are just more comfortable. I will not be a slave to fashion.
27. Chocolate is one of the ways God lets us know we are loved.
28. Boss taught me, after me being frustrated with some of my employees antics, that it doesn’t matter how a thing gets done, as long as it gets done. Again, my way is not necessarily the right or best way.
29. I have learned to keep my mind open and to make sure I have all the facts before making a decision about something.
30. I have learned that no matter what happens, I WILL be ok.
31. I have learned that it is a hell of a lot easier to be who I am than who society thinks I should be. I tried for a while to like boys and it just sucked. I would rather be a queer kid and have some people not like me versus being a straight kid and not liking myself.
32. All people are capable of great things. I don’t care if they are in jail, a drug user, or someone somebody might consider a good for nothing. I believe in the human spirit and that all people are inartistically ”good”.
33. I have learned never to ask someone to do something that I am not willing to do myself.
34. I don’t care who you are, like it or not, you are a role model. Someone is always watching you and learning about the world and how to behave in it from you. This happens at school, work, in line at the grocery store, or wherever you might be. One small thing you do or say can have a profound impact on someone’s life. Choose carefully.
35. I have learned that I have earned my 35 years. I look forward to earning the rest of my years as well. I am so grateful for all the lessons I have learned and for all the people who have been in my life to teach me. Thanks!

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